It's easy, sometimes human nature, to focus on the negative. But we can recognize 'positive influences' that coaches or others have on programs, teams, and players. Rather than focusing on 'pet peeves' or annoyances, let's review a few positives that we've heard over the years.
1. Share a kind word. My twin daughters were accomplished students and very good athletes. At a volleyball tournament, a coach came over (unsolicited) and said, "I love the way your daughters play; I wanted you to know. I also know that they would have no interest in attending the college I coach (a small state college)". A kind word costs nothing. And as Robert Townsend wrote in Up the Organization, "Thanks is the cheapest form of compensation." I would never criticize an opponent after a game, but try to compliment a player whose effort or play stood out.
2. Clean up your neighborhood. "Leave the gym in better condition than you found it." I usually carry a towel in the ball bag, because I don't want the bench area to resemble a swamp after the game. Somehow, water seems incapable of staying in water bottles.
3. Praise effort. Carol Dweck's work on performance (Mindset) demonstrates that praising effort yields more results than praising results, which can actually stifle youngsters' willingness to leave their comfort zone.
4. Radiate energy. "Nothing great is ever achieved without enthusiasm." Everyone at practices should be able to see, hear, and feel the energy. The coach is never excused from bringing energy to the court.We set the tone and control attitude, choices, and effort. Credit players who 'get it'.
5. Preach TEAM. Yes, each player adds value in proportion to their commitment and skill. But the best players improve those around them both as players and as people. Regardless of our skill level, we should play as a team, with accountability to each other. Recognize players who may not get as much credit otherwise but contributing meaningfully to the team.