MasterClass professor Kim Scott shares how to manage hard conversations with her term, "Radical Candor."
She uses a convention of a '2 x 2 matrix' to assess communication style through "care personally" and "challenge directly."
At our best, we are in Brad Stevens terms, "warm and demanding" equaling RADICAL CANDOR.
At our worst, uncaring and confrontational we use OBNOXIOUS AGGRESSION. Two problems with obnoxious aggression are 1) ineffectiveness and 2) personal hurt.
MANIPULATIVE INSINCERITY results in backstabbing, passive-aggressive behavior, or political malfeasance.
RUINOUS EMPATHY results when we care but fail to tell people what they need to know. It's silent failure.
Scott recommends using the framework for better conversations not to 'name names'.
She asks us to consider, "how can I be better?" Don't see managers, peers, or subordinates as enemies. Not engaging, not communicating is not an option.
Coaching is the art of communication through connection, teaching, psychology, reassessment and revision.
Critical components:
- Education changes behavior.
- Engender loyalty through trust, trust through caring.
- "Speak greatness" by doing the work of inspiration.
- Be accurate and specific.
- Use feedback sandwiches, "Kiss me. Kick me. Kiss me."
Skill development can be a form of "pure coaching," impacting winning without game management.
Economics is the 'allocation of scarce resources' which occurs during coaching games. The limited resources are minutes, role, and recognition.
Skilled coaches balance distributing those limited resources with the 'least hate and discontent'.