Every coach develops a philosophy, intentionally or habitually. Mine is imperfect and still evolving, but these are the principles I work on.
1. Coaches are truth tellers.
Our responsibility is to tell players what they need to hear, not simply what they want to hear. Growth begins with honest feedback delivered with respect.
2. Coaches and players succeed together.
A coach depends on the performance of individual players and the team. The notion that a coach wants a player to fail rarely survives even a moment of honest reflection. When players improve, everyone wins.
3. Coaching is a privilege.
Brad Stevens said, "Coaches get more than we give." The opportunity to teach, challenge, and encourage young people is an honor. The greatest rewards often come years later when former players return with gratitude and stories about lessons that lasted.
4. Speak greatness.
There is a profound difference between saying, "You did well, but..." and "You did well, and..." One language closes the conversation. The other builds on success while inviting continued improvement.
5. Correct without discouraging.
John Wooden often placed correction between genuine praise - a "sandwich" of encouragement, instruction, and confidence. Players should leave a conversation believing they can become better.
6. Build with positives.
Research consistently shows that healthy relationships require many more positive interactions than negative ones. Coaching should challenge players, but should also create confidence, hope, and belief.
7. Coach with conviction.
Bob Knight famously observed, "If you listen to the fans in the stands, soon you will be up there sitting next to them." Coaches should listen thoughtfully to others, but decisions must ultimately rest on principle, preparation, and judgment.
8. Coaches do have favorites.
Not favorite people - favorite habits. We naturally value players who arrive early, work hard, compete relentlessly, accept coaching, and place the team first. Those behaviors are available to everyone.
9. Never underestimate encouragement.
Few moments are more satisfying than honestly telling a player, "Good job," "Thank you," or, on rare occasions, "You're one of the best I've ever coached." Authentic praise endures.
10. Trust determines opportunity.
Talent matters, but trust determines who is on the floor when the game matters most. Reliability, discipline, and good decisions earn opportunities.
11. Never be a child's last coach.
Every athlete should leave your program believing that sports enriched their life, regardless of playing time or wins and losses.
12. Accept that criticism is inevitable.
No coach will be universally admired. Leadership requires difficult decisions that cannot satisfy everyone. If you need unconditional approval, coaching is the wrong profession.
13. Remember the Prime Directive.
Parents naturally place the well-being, role, recognition, and playing time of their own child ahead of the needs of the team. Coaches must respectfully acknowledge that reality while remaining committed to what gives the entire team the best chance to succeed.
14. Protect everyone.
When difficult conversations are necessary, have another adult present whenever appropriate. Document important discussions and decisions. Transparency protects players, families, and coaches alike.
15. Ask the hard question.
"What does it feel like to be coached by me?"
Players deserve honesty, accountability, respect, and hope. Coaches should continually seek feedback, reflect on their methods, and strive to become better teachers and better people.
Coaching is ultimately about relationships. Wins matter. Championships matter. But years later, players rarely remember every score. They remember how sports challenged them, how coaches treated them, and whether their coach cared and helped them improve as a player and person.
Learn every day. Teach what you know. Leave every player better than you found them.
Lagniappe.
