Del Harris has discussed the five level of communication with players. I'll share my take.
- Conversation. We learn about players, their lives, goals, hopes, and dreams and share life experiences. I want to have every player hear her name in the first ten minutes of practice. Nothing is more personal than your name.
- Instruction. Mutual participation is key. Communication is clarity and intent, but attentiveness and feedback separate communication from noise. Before warm ups, I usually share an educational quote, interactive experience, or historical anecdote. "Little things make big things happen." I'll ask them what that means for school and for basketball.
- Correction. When we don't correct flawed decision-making or technique, then we tolerate mediocrity. We can be demanding without being demeaning. One coach I respected greatly told players after any selfishness, "that is not how we play." I'll add, "that is not who we are." Correction can involve both IDENTITY and PERFORMANCE.
- Encouragement. I have totally corrupted a Hollywood line:
"Are we going to stand around here all day or are we going to fight?"
Some of you know Yoda's famous line from The Empire Strikes Back,
Near the apex of John Wooden's "Pyramid of Success" stand the words, FAITH and PATIENCE. At times players need our faith (belief) but impatience.
5. "Go Nuts." I have only done this once, as an assistant. A former team was getting totally pushed around with no response whatsoever, no heart and no toughness. The gist of my scolding was, "you cannot live your life like that. You have to stand up for yourself, you have to believe in each other. Quitting is never acceptable." Months later a player came up to me and said, "that line about how you live your life really got to me."
What we say has meaning, but how we make players feel and live matters most.