We might underestimate the otherishness of our peers. Adam Grant's Give and Take elaborates a world of givers, matchers, and takers. Effective coaching is a giving profession.
In his Wharton class, he challenged students to form RECIPROCITY RINGS, to help others achieve one desire, for themselves or others. Reciprocity rings force communication and actions to benefit others. Some students said that wouldn't happen because Wharton students are all takers.
But a funny thing happened; students collaborated, helping each other. Public exposure encourages takers to give. “Being altruistic is often seen as ‘good’ and being greedy or selfish is not,” according to Duke behavioral economist Dan Ariely.
Grant writes, "We have social norms against sounding too charitable," Wuthnow writes, "such that we call people who go around acting too charitable 'bleeding hearts,' 'do gooders'." We have prejudices against people who are too good.
Grant also writes that Wharton students don't want to look vulnerable, referring to a Dean's description as Game Face. To get help, even in a Reciprocity Ring, you have to ask for it.
In the hospital where I worked, nurses contributed "paid time off" to coworkers, especially those with serious health problems like cancer. They sacrificed some of their vacation to support a colleague in need.
We've all taken a practice or a game for colleagues with unavoidable absence or conflicts. Most coaches welcome other coaches at practice, camps, or simply to discuss their approaches and teams. But we have to ask.
Outstanding teams sacrifice individual achievement for victories. I call this "letters over numbers." Some players take "discounts" to increase a franchise's chance of winning.
Phil Jackson famously said, "basketball is sharing."
Don Meyer answered questions at his web site, asking nothing. "The Reciprocity Ring is a vehicle for creating an environment where the natural impulse to help can be cultivated and supported." Reach out and help colleagues.
Lagniappe: BOB toss back downscreen into three-pointer
Cavs Final BOB - Entry, Toss Back into Down Screen pic.twitter.com/HmEhZcfgmC— SeanBillermanHoops (@HoopsSean) July 18, 2019