The living and the dead inform our wisdom. In The Best of Frank Deford (2000), he shares an article entitled "Tough Love."
Deford describes tough coaches, from Vince Lombardi to Don Haskins and Pete Carril. In another era, "tough love" was the rule not the exception. Many young people expected and respected authority, and some anticipated voluntary or involuntary military commitments without coddling.
My coach, Sonny Lane, said "if I'm not yelling at you, then you should worry. Because I've given up on you as a player." I once used that line, but no longer.
Deford said P.J. Carlesimo, "has coached very much like Lombardi...and Carril and Haskins. His father was a coach who coached that way." And then along came Latrell Sprewell...
Deford continues, "what many boys and young men used to accept as fair discipline they now reject as harsh disrespect."
He finishes, "Coaches will never again mean quite what they did. Whether they can still matter so much - ah, that answer must await us."
Of course, Deford wrote this twenty years ago.
Our legacies live through the qualities and futures of our players, their lives, and the souls they touch. Players can embrace discipline, hard work, and sacrifice without what some perceive as abuse. Cal rugby icon Jack Clark calls it 'conditional love'. "Family means unconditional, whereas high-performance teams are highly, highly conditional organizations."
Are we splitting hairs? I don't believe that. Coaches evolve with the game and the players. Just call that coaching.
Tyrants and tinpot dictator coaches are out there, but in smaller numbers. When we think of coaching now, many of us think of communication and technical competence. Values will always matter, why we celebrate Kevin Eastman (Why the Best Are the Best) and the many excellent coaches who impart meaning without being demeaning.
Lagniappe:
Dribble drive drills with game video from FastModelSports
Example from reference.
