“Just having balance whether it’s home, on the field, all aspirations of your life. Everybody’s different. For some people, it may be spiritual, mixed with work and family. For some people, it may be different. Everyone has to find what their balance is for them."
1. Pause and reflect. Bennett discusses having the right focus among work, home, and goals. Freud believed life was about work and relationships. Viktor Frankl in Man's Search for Meaning, considered life the intersection of work, love, and suffering.
We see a minority of athletes and coaches who find balance. We see others, perhaps most notably Johnny Manziel, who spiral out of control in self-indulgent choices. In Ego is the Enemy, Ryan Holiday writes, "why is this happening to me? How do I save this prove to everyone I'm as great as they think. It's the animal fear of even the slightest sign of weakness...it is not the path to great things."
2. Urban Meyer describes it another way in Above the Line, playing "above the line." Above the line action has intent, purpose, and skill. Below the line behavior describes excuse-making, using blame, complain, and defend (your ego) tactics.
When we find extremes, we live cowardice or recklessness, not courage. When we experience extremes we feel fear or false invincibility, not humility.
3. The path to better choices demands seeing reality, accepting feedback, and the ability to self-regulate. This translate to "doing more of what is working and less of what isn't."
The more we know, the less self-absorption we should have as we appreciate how much more there is to know.
4. We need to help players attain balance, "what are you doing to make teammates better?" That includes quieting your ego. "You don't have to think less of yourself, but need to think about yourself."
When we have balance, it forces us away from an 'all-or-nothing approach' to life dimensions. It also limits us from ego extremes - entitlement, control, and paranoia.
5. Controlling our ego keeps us grounded. We can congratulate others sincerely on their success and remain gracious in victory. It demands that we recognize our ignorance and work to learn more and teach better. Balance creates action and encourages learning. It permits us to take criticism and advice.
